Have you been out in the dating world a while? Off and on find yourself single? Have you found yourself thinking no one is quite good enough for you? Or are you picking at all the details of a potential mate in hopes of avoiding yet another bad relationship? Do you find yourself always worried what your friends and family are thinking, fearing that others will be judging you and your choices? To avoid getting mad at yet another humiliation, have you become hyper vigilant and overly sensitive to “Red Flags”, real and imagined to others that may lead you to sabotage your happiness by misjudging and mistreating potential mates before their true intentions are known?
In short, are you a Dating Diva?
If so, here’s a Cornerstone Tip for you:
Be real. Let down your guard and be the real you. In spite of being hurt previously, the good news is that once you learn to Date Smarter you will find that it’s OK to be vulnerable again – under the right circumstances. The trick is to keep your heart open but not get so attached, or detached, that you can’t recognize when to walk away when you see someone is not a good fit for the new you. When should you walk and when should hang around for another date. You’ll never find Mr Right if you can’t keep your heart open and able to love while trying to learning from bad experiences
Opening your heart does not mean that you have to close your eyes, compromise your values or lose your “self” in desperation. Nor does it mean you will be trapped forever. Remember, in learning to Date Smarter you realize that finding a healthy, loving relationship is a journey; love and relationships come and go and this does not define us as not loveable, not good enough, or too good. We can love and be wrong and love again. We get as many tries as we want and no one else has the right to tell you otherwise. The trick is to learn the skills necessary to eventually find the one who is right for you and get off the dating merry-go-round.
As you learn to value and care about yourself, you will learn to know when to walk away when it’s no longer good for you. And as you Date Smarter, and allow yourself to be vulnerable but protected, you will also learn when it wise to risk hanging around a bit longer. Who knows, you just might find someone who finally “gets” you, respects the real you and believes it is worth investing the time to cultivate a mutually satisfying relationship with your authentic self….