In the 30+ years I have been working as a counselor, relationship coach, and social worker I have witnessed, experienced and grown a lot. Through professional training and trial and error I have learned a lot about myself and others as well as the ever changing dating world we live in. From my practice and personal experiences I created I DateSmarter, a comprehensive self improvement program to help anyone interested in making positive personal changes to find their perfect match.
I believe we are all in a process of evolving…..it is never too late to make changes to improve and enhance our lives and relationships. We all want to be happy and stop doing the things that make us unhappy. I think people are basically competent to manage their lives and relationships even though they may find themselves struggling from time to time.
We all have developed coping skills throughout our lives that work most of the time. People usually come in for counseling when their usual mode of coping is not working for some reason. They are looking for a change but can’t quite figure out how to begin the process and get started in the right direction. That’s where I come in…
Change can be difficult but it is inevitable. How we choose to change, for better or for worse, is a choice. Breaking bad habits and patterns in order to dating smarter is no exception. As you will see my program differs from others in that the focus is not on others but on ourselves. Getting to know ourselves better so that we can create new patterns and thereby attract the type of person we desire. Therefore, dating smarter begins within.
For myself, learning to date smarter has been a long, fluid process that has included deep personal assessments, therapy, and then creating my own personal blueprint for positive change. Among those changes has been my pursuit of functional fitness, a holistic approach to becoming the best, strongest, and most competent person I can be physically, emotionally, spiritually and financially.
As a dating and relationship coach, I liken my role to be similar to that of a detective, tour guide, and mentor. As a professional therapist – and a women – I have been on both sides of the table when it comes to relationships.
As a detective I gather information and clues that make up the dating and relationship puzzle. I then help you assemble the clues, or your “life puzzle pieces” into a picture so that we can better understand the context and content of your life. What can we figure out about how you got where you are, what is motivating you and others, what is your part in the relationship dance, and what can you change and what can you not change?
As your guide I’ll help you stop taking the same wrong turns as you travel along the road of life toward relationship happiness. I have a lot of tools in my tool kit and don’t believe there are absolute rights and wrongs. I encourage my clients to give me feedback about what is working and what is not working so that we can tweak your plan as we work together, making our work as productive as possible. You will actively participate as we go through the process of discovery, or what I call an Intensive Dating Evaluation and Assessment, or “IDeA”.
Your IDeA will become your new blueprint for dating smarter. And I will be your mentor as you begin your new journey to dating smarter and finding lasting happiness.